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My Teacher, My World.

It was as if our heart stopped.

My teacher, mentor and caretaker was run down in the streets last week. The world became darker than it had been that day, and I have seen little but the shade since. I am not sure how the others in the circus make their peace with this. For me, I have always had my mother and brother with me and they continue to keep part of my world as it should be.

But Miranda was my teacher, the one who took the time to pour over old tomes with me, to correct my stunted pronunciation of draconic syllables that unlock the arcane, to make sure I knew the formulae that could change the world. Yes, change the world. She saw my potential, nursed it, and strengthened my confidence in the good of this world. Now, that is gone.

In whatever Tvashtri has in store for our Madame Eva, I hope Miranda rests well, for she is so missed in this world.

And poor Fortunato. His heart also seems to have stopped for our circus has not moved in days. I can not even approach him, his grief is so powerful. It doubles my pain to be close to him. I hope that the Kings have mercy on him and all of us. Little is worse than sitting in this wretched place with memories wrapped around us like a horrible, cloying darkness. To me, even our usual games of Three Dragon Ante are just shadowplay--there is no relief in them from this despair.

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April 2010

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